It is hard to admit when things aren’t going the way you imagined them to. Even with all of the amazing new experiences, I have to admit that life is a little tough right now. I’ve been feeling lonely. I knew that it would be hard to move away from so many people that I love and care about, but I didn’t know that it would sting in this particular, heart wrenching way.
There is a comfort and solace that can only be found around those people who know you on a deep, intimate, emotional level. It chokes me up just to write that because I miss my friends and family more than I realized up until this point. It feels super vulnerable to admit that. I think I am still carrying this outward perception of myself that everything has to be happy and exciting all the time. I don’t like to admit when I am feeling blue, but admitting it is also one of the most healing things I can do right now.
Yesterday I took a long walk through my neighbourhood and talked to my mom on the phone. If I’ve learned one thing throughout my years of university and living away from home, it is that I can never hide my true feelings from my mom. She always picks up on how I am feeling even if I don’t say it directly. I value that intimacy more than I can say, but it also hurts to have to confront those very real feelings. It wasn’t until I spoke to her that I realized how acute that feeling of loneliness was.
After we spoke, I lay in the park staring up at the salmon pink sky as the sun set over the lake. For the first time since I got here, I let myself fully feel my emotions. Just sit with my own thoughts and let them run through me until I felt a kind of resolve. Feeling sad because of how much I love the important people in my life is still a beautiful thing. It might suck to experience, but it just confirms the knowledge that these people will be in my life forever, no matter the distance.
And, in a way, this is all a moment in time. That piercing sadness isn’t constant or drawn out. Amidst the turmoil of all these feelings is also so much happiness and excitement. I’ve seen some of the most beautiful views from high up a mountain peak, shared laughter and conversation, met some really rad new people, and dug my toes into the earth of a place I have been meaning to call home for a long time. It is all just a complex mess of notes and chords that I am riding out while I sink my roots deeper into this new terrain.
Thanks for hanging in here while I poured out all my messy feelings onto this page. I love you all and thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading these words every week. It means the world to me to have this space to share with you all, especially right now. xo
I just have a simple recipe for you folks today. A quick dinner that is nourishing and delicious. Sebastian and I enjoyed these on a blanket at the beach while watching the sunset and it was lovely.
The broccoli is roasted in a marinade of lemon, dijon, and olive oil. It is completely addictive! If you love that tangy, sharpness that lemon and dijon bring to each other this is the combination for you.
When I was first imagining the recipe I couldn’t get past the roasted broccoli topped with the smokey tempeh crumble. That’s it, just broccoli and tempeh. However, I try to post recipes here that can either be taken apart for simpler, smaller meals, or can serve as a more filling dish. This one can really be either – although I have to say that the melty, caramelized sweetness of the roasted yam is delicious.
As always, let me know if you make this! I’d also love to hear suggestions on what kinds of posts you’d like to see in this space. Feel free to send me an email or leave a comment with your ideas. <3
Yam Boats w/ Lemony Dijon Roasted Broccoli & Smokey Tempeh Crumble
Serves 2 – with leftover tempeh
- 2 medium sized yams
- 1 head of broccoli, cut into small florets
- juice of 1 lemon
- 1 tbsp dijon mustard
- 1 tbsp + 1 tsp olive oil (divided)
- 1 pkg tempeh (8 oz), cubed as small as you can
- 1/2 tsp paprika
- 1/8 tsp chili powder
- 2 tbsp soy sauce
- 1 tsp sriracha
Preheat oven to 450.
Wrap the yams in tinfoil and bake for 45 – 55 minutes, until soft enough for a knife to easily slide through.
While the yams are baking whisk together lemon juice, dijon, and 1 tbsp of the olive oil until combined. Toss the broccoli florets with the dressing and lay on a baking sheet or cast iron skillet. When the yams have been in the oven for 35 minutes, add the broccoli to the oven and roast for 15 minutes until crispy and browned.
Heat 1 tsp olive oil in a cast iron pan over medium heat. Add the cubed tempeh and sauté for 3-5 minutes. Add the paprika, chili powder, soy sauce and sriracha and sauté for another 2-3 minutes until golden brown. Remove from heat.
To assemble, slice the yams lengthways about 3/4 deep (make sure not to slice all the way through). Hollow out a tablespoon or two of yam and then fill with broccoli and top with tempeh. Drizzle with sriracha and serve hot!